My Crash-course in Parenting...

So this week I took over "parent duties" for Kimberly and Stew while they were in the hospital with new baby Karis. From Monday morning, until Wednesday afternoon, I've had the little buggers 24/7. As much as I've babysat by myself for over 8 years, this was more of a first for me. It changes quite a bit when you can't just "give" the kids back at the end of the day ;). My room mate Christel, who also lives with us, was here too, but she has class and nannys for another family during the day, so it was just me and the kiddos during that time.

Monday was a fairly easy day with them. I took them to a pottery place to make something for Karis, which was really fun, and they didn't break anything! Kimberly was scheduled to be enduced that morning so we played a waiting game all day for the news that Karis was here. At 1:50pm Karis Elizabeth Stewart was born! We spent the afternoon here and brought the kids up to see their baby sister after dinner. They did so great with her. Sally treated her like another one of her baby dolls, and Wesley Grant instantly turned into protective big brother. By the time we left to come home, they were pretty pooped and went right to bed at 8.

Sally, Wesley Grant, and new sister Karis

Tuesday, however, was a different story. Wesley Grant woke up at 6:45am, and Sally soon followed. He woke up full of energy and didn't let up all morning. I've had to learn the balance of realizing when he's just being a 3-year old boy, and when he's actually disobeying me. For the most part, when he's been a little crazy this week, it's just because he's a boy and he's stir crazy. By the time I got them in the car at 11am to take them to the hospital, I just sat in the car for a minute, I was so exhausted! I got to leave them at the hospital with Stew while I left to get lunch and go up to the office for staff meeting. Lauren Ramirez stayed at the house when the kids got back from lunch and stayed with them while they went down for naps. I came into a quiet house when I got back and just pondered the silence for a while. I was so tired but couldn't really sleep, so I just rested in my room and read until they woke up at 5. That night Wesley Grant was awesome, but Sally what the whiner. She had cut her finger a little bit and had a runny nose, the combination I think that led to her be more needy than ever. After we just sat and rocked for a while she was better, and Christel took them down the street to a neighborhood Backyard Bible Club this week while I had my girl's small group over.

Christel and Karis

When they got back, Wesley Grant was so excited to see me and "all my friends" as he said. I really felt like a parent does when their kids rush home to see them. Christel put them in the bath while we finished up in the living room, but as they finished up I began to hear Wesley Grant shouting at her. He's pulled this before with Christel, but hadn't really tested it much with me. When I walked in the bathroom, he stopped yelling and went "uh-oh," I almost laughed at him aknowledging that he was getting in trouble due to my presence, but I held off. He didn't want to get out of the tub and began splashing us and throwing things out of the tub, I knew I was in for a battle. These situations always bring me back to the countless years of child life experience and training I did at Cook Children's hospital in Fort Worth. It's funny how that stuff actually applies later on in life...He was not willing to actually do anything I asked, so I picked him up in his towel kicking and screaming and took him to his room. I just sat with him on the floor in the "restraining position" as I call it, where his back is to my chest and I just wrap my arms and legs around him so he can't move. I learned this after a summer camp I did last year with Cook's, it's one of the only ways you can restrain kids in school and it's also the most effective because the kids are so close to you it's a good transition into feeling love when they calm down. He probably fought me for a good 10 minutes, it's funny to hear some of the things he says, and his progression of words. He always says "I'm so angry!" and I really just try to speak loving words to him, and somewhat reason with him. Finally, he just shouted, "I want some water!" and like that, he was calm. He asked Christel nicely for water, put his pull-up on, and got in bed. It was like turning off a light switch.

Even though yesterday was the hardest day, it was the most rewarding. Having to actually discipline the kids, but see the fruit of that, was a really rewarding feeling. I never want to feel like I'm "controlling" them all the time, so when I have to hold Wesley down, it's usually only after he's had a serious outburst. It's funny to see how he responds to me now, I can just give him a look or come into a room and he knows he's in trouble. Being back in a family setting has shown me just how sinful in nature we are. You can't teach kids to throw a fit, they didn't see that from you, and you can't teach them to say a lot of the things they do. But we're proned to certain sins, and even from a young age they are apparent. Wesley is a passionate kid, and will someday be an incredible young man who stands up for what he believes when everyone else is sitting down. But until then, his energy and passion is unharnassed, and it's up to his parents, and for a small time this week, for me and Christel, to channel that for him. There have been times when Christel and I have just looked at each other and thrown our hands up, like "we're never having kids!" But then we get to see Wesley Grant and Sally see their baby sister for the first time, or even hold Karis ourselves, then go through so much with the kiddos at home, that it makes me value family even more. I thought I knew how to parent until this week. Not to say I'm even close to being there, but I feel like I've seen some climpses of why God has given us children, and as Stew says, it's long, long periods of frustration and chaos, mixed with small glimpses of hope and reward :)